Happy Birthday v Stressful Birthday
I have lots of conversations with Parents who instead of finding their kid’s birthdays fun and memorable, they find them stressful and expensive and it definitely doesn’t have to be this way!
As you can imagine having five kids’ birthdays in the house it would be easy for things to escalate but we’ve kept to a few simple principles which has helped a lot and still made birthdays a win.
DECIDE ON A TRADITION AND MAKE THAT SPECIAL
In our house we always have a birthday breakfast and whoever’s birthday it is gets to decide what we have and it can be whatever they want - within reason! We decorate the table the night before, put a banner up, display any presents and cards and make sure they are the guest of honour! Pretty simple (especially when all they want is coco pops for a treat!) but memorable and special. For you it might be something else - cake at breakfast or a special family meal - whatever it is - don’t make it too complicated and make sure it’s a non negotiable each year.
TAP INTO THEIR LOVE LANGUAGE
Not all kids want a big party and sometimes they can feel as much pressure to have one as you do! As soon as they’re old enough, have a conversation about what would make them feel special and celebrated on their birthday. Sometimes it’s doing something as a family or a day somewhere where they’ve always wanted to go. Jackson has always been football mad so for many years he wanted a football party. Organised parties were so expensive so we went to the park, Andrew organised football training then a match and we ordered pizzas. They loved it!
https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes
THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX
Zak’s birthday is January so sometimes it’s tricky to do something that doesn’t cost the earth. One year Andrew investigated and tickets to Copenhagen were super cheap - even cheaper than them both going into London for the day which is 30 minutes away! So we took him out of school and they got an early morning flight, had the best day and were home later that night! Zak will never forget that and it was way cheaper than a birthday party!
KNOW YOUR LIMITS
We’ve never gone crazy with presents on our kid’s birthdays. We make them feel special all year round and I’m not sure there’s much that they need. They also get presents from family and friends so we usually get them one main present and a few little ones. I think we feel far too much pressure to overload them with gifts but we must teach them that gifts aren’t the complete focus of their birthday! Too many people feel pressure to go into debt or over stretch to get their kids everything they want - it just creates an expectation that grows and gets more difficult to manage as they get older.
HAVE FUN!
You’re supposed to have fun at your kid’s birthdays too! It’s a celebration of when they came into your world so don’t over stress and feel pressured - do what works for your family and have loads of fun!
Hope that helps…..here’s to lots of birthday fun!
Louise x